Food and Thought

Miso soup: Simple, delicious, nutritious. I made a large pot of it that should last me a few days if I control myself from having it at every meal.

This is also the first meal I've cooked in a very long time. My kitchen has been somewhat of a construction zone for the past couple months, and although it still is not complete, it is finally in working order. Finally.

You mix soybean paste and hot water. That's essentially it -- but take care not to let it boil -- and when the temperature is right, sip it straight from the bowl. Add more ingredients if you like; I always throw in some seaweed, little tofu cubes, and scallions.

Mark left today. The house is quiet and empty, save a few pieces of makeshift furniture here and there. Most things in my house are vaguely categorized as miscellaneous, making them ridiculously difficult to deal with. A pile here, a pile there, unmoving, waiting to be assigned.

I like keeping my ingredients simple and balanced. The seaweed weightlessly dances in the broth, tofu stays anchored, and scallions scatter on the surface.

Then there are the things that need to be done, those errands that have been escaping me but still surround me. I can see them in my peripheral vision, like a stranger that is following me, but I'd rather not turn to look. I don't want to deal with these tasks just yet. Now that I'm alone, I'm sure they'll start taking precedence. Maybe I'll get to them tomorrow.

And then there are the stationary things strewn in my field of vision. I put my youngest ferret, Ricky, to sleep on Thursday. Friday marked six years since my father died. I was in a car accident last week. I'm still not completely certain that I'm going off to school until we get approved for a lease, which has become increasingly difficult. I don't have a car, but I really don't have anywhere to go anyway. My only real task is to finish sorting my house and my life.

I'm ready for it to be September already, I am ready to move, I am ready to focus on the things that I love. I'm ready to call this long-distance relationship a thing of the past. It's time to start a life together.

I'm ready to be myself again.