Wrapping it up

Everyone blogs for a different reason; as a reader, it is my opinion that most blogs are products of a simple indulgence - look what I am doing, look what I have done. There's a term out there for it: Micro Fame. A way to selfishly share their lives without having to reciprocate and listen to others. The selfishness can easily be offset by reading other blogs, so essentially you get a bunch of people relating to others without interaction -- unless you comment each other, of course. I'm still amused by the "look what I'm doing every five minutes" style of blogging, even though I don't agree with bombarding people with so much useless information; I'm not really interested in knowing that you stubbed your toe 5 seconds ago and that your last fart smelled like bacon. It's interesting, though, that blogs have provided us the ability to know each other's intimate thoughts, yet still keep us at a safe distance, disconnected. It used to take effort -- a phone call or personal visit -- to find out how and what a friend was doing. Now, we place our emotions and experiences on a 24 Hour Buffet -- I've put it all out there... please take what you like, when you'd like.
I don't have a problem with this new system. In fact, it makes me all the more appreciative of the "old" ways; a phone call from a friend can make my day. And in cases of my dear friend Danielle, it is sometimes the only way to keep up with her trials and tribulations in another hemisphere. And her blog is something to admire, because it is also a great resource of how to survive when suddenly moving to Brazil in addition to her intelligent editorials and daily events.
Sometimes my own blogging was sporadic. I've always tried to keep the the right priorities: This is a blog about life, not a life about a blog. Quality over quantity.

Ultimately it comes down to this: This is a blog about my journey through grief and transition. Anyone that has lost a parent, or both, understands what an adventure it can be. The fact is that my journey will never end... it simply becomes a bit easier; I know how the path is paved, but sharp turns inevitably pop up whenever I think I know where I'm going.

Six years ago, I spent a week at the United States Naval Academy, in preparation to attend that prestigious institution. The competition was fierce, but I made it to the summer program, a good indication that I was on track to gain my admission. I wrote to my father, the Army man, every evening and detailed my experiences. He was so very proud that I had made it there. On the last day, we were subjected to yelling, questioning, and intense physical exertion -- your average boot camp stuff -- but most of us were spoiled 17 year old kids, so this was extreme. I just remember doing push ups as they mopped up the sweat and tears off the floor in front of me. Then, suddenly, we were sent outside to the main courtyard, greeted by the Navy band and the Dean. We were soaked in sweat, and now rain, yet we were overcome with so much pride... we freaking survived. I remember cheering, hugging strangers, and feeling euphoric. At the time, I considered it the proudest, most challenging time of my life.

A month later, I pressed my ear to my father's chest as his heart beat its final time. I planned the funeral and gave my eulogy to a standing room only crowd. I buried my parents together, after having held onto my mother's ashes for 12 years. The next few months became the most difficult challenge of my life.

I received the congressional nomination required for admission to the academy, but it no longer made sense to go. My only support was gone. Later, I got accepted to all the UC's that I applied to, but I found myself unable to go. New challenges -- a house, a business, a crash course in adult life -- all prevented me from going off to school.

I try not to use becoming an orphan at 17 as a scapegoat. But I cannot deny the catastrophic change it has caused in my personal development. There was a reason that I excelled at many jobs I once held, but never stuck with: It just wasn't where I was supposed to be. There was a reason I couldn't make house payments: I wasn't supposed to be a homeowner! (yet.) I just felt like I was living someone else's life. Even after being criticized by people I considered friends at the time, being told that my chances were gone, that I should find a trade and stick with it, etc etc... I made it. On the flipside, there are the friendships that have endured through all of this, that never doubted me. Those friendships make the naysayers hardly even memorable.

Five years later, I am here. I'm sitting in the UC Davis library, doing what I've only dreamed of: Putting off studying to write a blog post. Haha.

Every day I have my "I can't believe I'm here!" moments, and my friends always tease me for being the one that repeatedly asks, "Don't you just LOVE it here?" Finally, I am directing my own life. I am no longer having to react to circumstances beyond my control. I have choices, something I missed for a very long time. Best of all, I have the love of my life by my side.

The transition is over, and there is no longer any uncertainty.
I am retiring this blog.

But I'm still around, and I'll still receive comments. So if for any reason you want an update, let me know.

And if you're in town, we'll share a Cafecito con Leche.

The EZ Lube Story

It's not that I want attention -- I really enjoy putting the spotlight on anyone who is behaving badly on purpose. And they do it because they think they can get away with it, that their mistreatment of others will go unannounced... and without consequence.
F--- THAT!
EZ-Lube intentionally screwed me over. Accidents happen -- I was just the random, unlucky person to not have my oil change completed. It happens. But to refuse to budge, to ignore my requests, to not be reasonable... and to purposely drag it out in hopes that I'd simply go away... that's seriously fucked up.

So, I made noise. I like making noise. It works. Here is the result:



Yay! Now I'm just waiting on that check.

Overdue Update on Things

Okay. I've calmed down. EZ Lube appealed the court's decision simply to buy more time. They are not interested in actually going back to court, rather they know that the deadline before the judgement gets entered is only a week away, so the appeal pushes that deadline back another month. I'll be waiting for my check, jerks. So that was pleasant news. Also, the local news station is doing an in depth report on this whole incident. I filmed an interview before moving, and they're finally airing it now since this is sweeps week for the networks. All I can say is... they filmed that DAYS before I moved -- the craziest, most stressful time ever! I'm sure I looked pretty haggard during the interview. Oh well... I don't live there anymore anyway! So you local folks... 11pm on channel 6 tonight.

The EZ Lube stuff sent me for a loop last night, and on top of that, my brain was fried from studying for my 2nd Art History midterm THIS MORNING which consisted of testing me on the names, dates, locations and descriptions of 40 or so pieces of Greek art. Glad that's over. That concludes the midterms for this quarter, and soon enough, this quarter will be over. Time flies on the quarter system.

I'm also proud to announce that Mark left today to attend his graduation ceremony. I really wanted to go, but I had that tedious midterm. Also, my not attending saves us hotel costs and having to get a pet sitter... and it affords his family an extra ticket so that no one gets left out. It's an exciting event for his family, because even though he's too humble to admit pride in his great accomplishment, he's the first one to graduate college! It's a great reflection of his parents' ability to provide him the opportunity to get his degree, as well as his own commitment to higher education. What is also remarkable is that he completed the the 180 units required for a bachelor's degree in about 2.5 years... that takes four years for the rest of us! He keeps brushing it off like it's no big deal, so hopefully he'll see the great amount of pride that his family has tomorrow when they hand him that diploma. And it has a been a good year for his family; just a few months ago his sister completed Junior College, so maybe there will be another Bachelor's Degree in the family in the next few years.

In the meantime, I am just chugging along with school stuff, selling the house stuff, and UNPACKING. The kitchen is done. The living room is sorta done... there are only a few of Mark's boxes left in there to be dealt with. The bedroom is a disaster, and the office is an obstacle course. There will be major organizing occurring this weekend! Thankfully, Mark made a "don't fit/don't wear/donate" pile of clothes, so he managed to decrease the piles of clothing that he owns. Now, instead of being able to clothe a small country, he can merely clothe a small village. For a year.

...and this biking as my only form of transportation thing is starting to pay off. I don't think I've lost any weight in pounds, but my endurance is getting a lot better and I don't feel like I am going to die before getting to my destination anymore. There are also certain areas that make me sneeze as I go by, and I have learned to turn my head when sneezing to avoid getting hit by my own mighty mucous mist.

And in recent news, Sunday marked the 2nd anniversary of the day I flew to Utah to see Mark for the first time. We've deemed that day the "official" start of the relationship, even though we considered ourselves together before actually, you know, getting together. I'll spare you the graphic details. He treated me to a steak dinner, 18 white roses, and a really nice conversation over dinner. During the day, we took a little road trip with the dogs through a neighboring town and up into the mountains. It was just a really nice break from reality. I'll get those photos posted when he gets back from Utah, since he took my camera with him.

So now I've got errands to run, including figuring out how to buy a 30 lb bag of dog food and getting it home without a car. Balance it on the handlebars? Should be interesting!

Ah, and here's a photo of Mark and I at the last home football game. Enjoy!

Uggggggggghh

EZ LUBE APPEALED!!!

I have to fly back down to southern California to go to court AGAIN.

Schmucks!

I think everyone knows one of these...

You're terribly spoiled. The worst part is that you don't even realize it, instead, you are cursed with a sense of entitlement. You air your problems with a great deal of exaggeration and when you overcome them (often at the aid of your family) you feel as if you have truly struggled and overcome... even if it is something trivial that the rest of us deal with on a daily basis. And you expect applause and praise. You have your moments of kindness towards others, but they are so overshadowed by your rudeness, abrasiveness and narcissism...

You've hurt my feelings many times and I don't like you. But you don't bother to pay attention anyway. There's no sense in rebuilding a friendship that never really existed.

I honestly hope that you have not been impaired by the low standards set for you. By praising your small accomplishments, you have a false sense that these same accomplishments are huge... when in reality they are simply stepping stones. I know that the behaviors you exhibit are a product of years of coddling. I wish everyone would have had higher expectations for you rather than the "well, we're just glad you made it this far" mentality.

I would love to talk to you, perhaps give you another perspective, and get you out of the ditch they've dug for you. But you cannot see past your own reflection at this point. Have you ever asked yourself why everyone seems to know you so well, but of those people, there are some you hardly even know?

I want you to strive for more, keep going on this path that you have so recently stalled upon. I want you to grow.

I want you to grow up.

Take a few minutes...

Bittersweet Victory

I'm still hoping that Prop 8 won't pass...
we might need a miracle.

UPDATE: I'm disappointed at people's ignorance. Get a clue, people.

My biggest college accomplishment so far...

So without going into great detail about how much I had been dreading this morning....
I ran 1.5 miles in 19:55 minutes. Before the run, he coach announced that the cutoff was 20 minutes, to which some people responded, "Isn't that just walking?"

No, it's not, bitch.

19:55 minutes. Yes, that's slow, and yes, I got lapped by almost everyone else on the rowing team, and yes, I made it very apparent that I was hating it by my loud sighs and "i'm too old for this shit!" mutterings, but dammit, I made it. I could barely run a 15 minute mile in high school, so this was a big thing for me. And I had to do this at 6:15 am, which makes this the earliest I've woken up since living in Davis.

I hope to never have to do it again. (the running part... well, maybe even the waking up early part too.)

I'm going back to bed.

This just in:

SMALL CLAIMS HEARING
10/20/2008 - 8:30 AM DEPT. 1C

HONORABLE JOHN G EVANS, PRESIDING

CLERK: V. RODRIGUEZ

COURT REPORTER: NONE

MICHELLE A REPRESENTED BY/IN PRO PER

ON THE PLAINTIFF'S CLAIM (INDIO) OF MICHELLE DEFENDANT/CROSS-DEFENDANT ALLEN BRAUN ORDERED DISMISSED WITHOUT PREJUDICE.

VARIOUS DOCUMENTS RECEIVED BY THE COURT, CONSIDERED AND RETURNED TO OFFERING PARTY.

THE FOLLOWING ARE SWORN AND EXAMINED: ALL PARTIES

SMALL CLAIMS ACTION TAKEN UNDER SUBMISSION

/////

COURT SUBSEQUENTLY RULES:

JUDGMENT ON PLAINTIFF'S CLAIM (INDIO) OF MICHELLE

JUDGMENT ON PLAINTIFF'S CLAIM FOR MICHELLE

AND AGAINST DEFENDANT DANIEL F PRENDERGAST, KEITH ALESSI, MICHAEL DOBSON, RICHARD TEASTA, EZ LUBE LLC

IN THE AMOUNT OF $5890.00 PLUS COSTS OF $195.00

A COPY OF THIS SMALL CLAIMS JUDGMENT AND NOTICE OF ENTRY OF JUDGMENT WAS MAILED TO PLAINTIFF DEFENDANT

NOTICE OF ENTRY OF JUDGMENT PRINTED

Favorite Foods, Frozen yogurt, Football, Friends...

I'm a little surprised at just how quickly the days are going by. Classes have been going on for two weeks, and it's been almost an entire month since I got here. So far so good.
I can't really say that I miss the desert -- I'll occasionally glance over the local news for that area -- but I do miss my little sister and my close friends. So... I miss like 8 people. If you're reading this, you're probably one of them. And you're welcome to come visit me anytime. I have moments where I get annoyed that I don't know everything there is to know about my new town, "I'm hungry at 10pm! What to eat?" but I honestly can't complain.

Mark arrived a week ago and promptly started working on Monday. It's been interesting so far as neither of us has been able to unpack much -- so there are things scattered everywhere. I've tried to make nice stacks of boxes to allude to my organizational nature, but it's not working very well. It's also very amusing to see the insane amounts of clothing that he owns. I think he could survive without doing laundry for 3 months straight without wearing something twice. Me? Maybe a week. Note to self: Use as an excuse for future clothes shopping.

So right now my favorite places to eat are Crepeville and Cultivé Frozen Yogurt. This is completely unfair, because I really haven't gone anywhere else to eat. These places are so delicious that I don't even want to try anything new yet. Crepeville makes enormous crepes that can feed two, which makes the meal nice and cheap and satisfying. Behold:

So there's one temptation that I'm working on resisting. This one is easily avoided by simply eating at home. The second temptation, however, is not easily avoided. There is no way to satisfy a craving for Cultivé other than just getting up and going there. Their frozen yogurt is simply amazing. The toppings are delicious, ranging from fresh fruit to fruity pebbles. Okay, so what makes it irresistable? My body needs it to function -- there ARE A BAZILLION live active cultures in it that are essential to my nutrition! Oh and it's fat free, too, so when convincing myself not to go there, I have absolutely no reason not to. Behold:

Delish.

In non-food related news, I've made a few friends so far. It's a little slow going since I am not in the dorms, and my lectures are so huge that they don't really afford you the time to interact with anyone. The only real class that gives me the chance to get to know my classmates is my Animal Bio Lab class.. and I'm usually wrists deep into a dead fish. :D :D :D There is something seriously wrong with the fact that I love cutting into dead things and pulling them apart.

My closest friend here is Weijing (Way-cheen) -- she's of chinese descent, but she's from Mexico City. It confuses everyone that meets her; they see her and think she's Chinese-American, then she starts speaking Spanish perfectly, and they just can't wrap their heads around it. I've had complete strangers ask me (when she's not around) "What IS she?" And then I try to explain the possibility that not everyone emigrates to America. Anyway, she's great.. and she's essentially on her own out here since her family is still in Mexico, so we can relate a lot and provide each other unique perspectives on things. Yay. She's also hilarious and we're always cracking each other up.

I've really been making a point of getting out and getting into what the town and university has to offer -- part of this is me trying to be more outgoing, but also getting my money's worth on this investment! Tuition is expensive! Free tickets? Free bus rides? I am milking all these student benefits for what they are worth! So the day after Mark got here, we went to a football game. I managed to get him a student t-shirt, and Weijing graciously gave him her student ticket, so he was able pretend to be a student in the student section. The game turned out to be the MOST EPIC GAME in history, with the winning points being scored from a 32 yard hail mary with only 2.9 seconds left on the clock -- it was seriously a miracle. Read about it here. The entire student section rushed the field and all hell broke loose and it was the most fun I've had in a long time. I forgot how much I really do like football -- years of watching it as a kid with my father are finally paying off.

We also attended a block party pot-luck thing for our neighborhood -- the city of Davis organizes it every year so that students and residents can get to know each other. Since I was sending Mark to go get the ingredients for our dish, I decided to go with something simple. You know, so it would be easy to pick up what we need. The recipe? Crab Salad with twist: get the premade stuff and add chopped toasted almonds, cilantro, lime, and put it on Pumpernickel toasts.
He's at the store. My phone rings.

"They don't have crab salad, can we use Seafood salad?"
"Yes. We need about 3 cups."
(pause, deli attendant talking in background)
"It only comes in pounds."
"Try to estimate"
"ummm.... Okay."
(more deli attendant conversation)
"Honey, I need to go, just call me if you need any more help."
"oh okay."

Phone rings again.

"Roasted Salted Almonds? Cause that's all they have"
"No... you're in the wrong aisle. Those are snacker nuts, you need to go over to the baking stuff."
"Okay"

Phone rings again.

"They only have slivered almonds"
"That's it? No other types??"
"No."
"Okay those will work."

Phone rings again.

"Cilantro, right?"
"YES."

Phone rings again.

"I'm in the bread section, I don't see the pumpernickel you want."
"Try the cheese section, where the Brie is. I'm sure they have it there"
"I'm only seeing water crackers."
"Keep looking."
"oh. there it is."

I forgot to mention that all of these phone calls took place while I was in the shower.

Exhausted, my gallant gatherer hands over the ingredients... and after toasting and chopping the almonds, toasting the pumpernickel, and throwing at all together, this is what I ended up with:

I say "what I ended up with" because after he handed me the ingredients, he seriously went and took a nap. The grocery store depleted him of all his energy. Mark says it's the hardest thing he ever had to do in his life. ::insert eye roll here:: Gotta love him.

My first midterm is in a week... can you believe it? Life is good. Come visit! It'll give me more motivation to unpack!

Paradise, frankenstein bikes, and the Dingo

Well yesterday did not go as planned at all. I woke up at about 4 am to Socks dry heaving... if you're a dog owner, you know that sound. It makes you wake up, jump out of bed and make it to the nearest door to let the dog out in .5 seconds. It doesn't matter how cold or tired you are, you instinctual get a vomiting dog OUTSIDE without even thinking about it.
So on a very cold [to me] Davis morning, I found myself outside at 4 am with Socks, who seemed like she wanted to vomit, but was not producing anything -- just retching. Mark, who managed to bring himself to full consciousness this early in the morning, suggested that I call the UC Davis Teaching Hospital, which is the 24-hour vet around here. I am kinda against calling in these situations.... if it's an emergency, take the dog in. If it can wait, then wait. Very simple. A phone diagnosis is next to impossible. I called anyway, and the student that I spoke to served more as a therapist to me and helped calm me down.
The reason I was so concerned was because retching can sometimes be a the indicator of GDV, otherwise known as bloat. It's the #2 killer in dogs, and occurs in deeper chested dogs, like Dobies. More about bloat here. Luckily, all the other bloat symptoms were absent, and that is what ultimately made me go to bed and not worry about it until normal business hours.

So at 9am, after more retching, I made an appointment with a local vet that a few neighbors recommended. I had to call a cab to get out there, since EZ LUBE RUINED MY ENGINE and I have no way to get my old girl across town.

Dramatization

End result: Socks is okay... but the suspicion is that something is up with her esophagus rather than her stomach. She's on a rice and cottage cheese diet for now, and she's getting some Pepcid AC with her meals. That, added to the anti-inflammatory she's taking for her lower back and the joint support pills... Socks is one old lady. But I love her and so I'll keep her going as long as she wants to.

So no farmer's market. Instead, I ordered groceries online and had them delivered this morning. I'm not bike confident enough yet to hang groceries from my handlebars, so this was a great alternative. I hope to never use this option again, because it just felt sorta bourgeoisie having a Safeway.com truck in front of my house.

In the evening, I hopped on my bike to explore the neighborhood.
I ventured into an area which reminded me of the Secret Garden... I went through some path and all of a sudden I was in the most beautiful neighborhood ever. There were tons of bike paths and I almost felt like I was discovering some mystical land. There were homes with large gardens, people cultivating, sunflowers and green everywhere.... and then a tiny vineyard. Oh and few parks thrown in there, the sounds of kids playing, people playing Frisbee.... what the hell is this place? Is this normal around here? Do these people know the paradise they're living in??? I later found out that I had found myself in the middle of Village Homes, one of the nicest places to live in Davis. Not bad. I'll take a camera next time and get some nice shots so you'll at least have an idea of what I'm raving about.

On my way home, I ran into a bunch of kids riding crazy looking bicycles. As it turns out, my neighbor down the street is Peter Wagner, famous in this town for making the most unique bikes you've ever seen. When I first passed by his house, I assumed his front yard was some sort of bicycle graveyard. When a kid on a penny farthing rode by, I couldn't help but laugh. I soon found out that I was riding through the neighborhood block party.

Really? There's such thing? Neighbors that know each other and talk to each other? I went home and changed and went back to check it out. I can't remember any names at this point but the people were awesome and very friendly. I sat at a table and engaged in some great conversation with people that I didn't even know. It was really nice... something you'd never find in the desert. Crazy.

Which brings me to the favorite part of my evening... A neighbor asked, "Are you the new neighbor with the two large dogs? My boys were telling me about them. They said one of your dogs is part Dingo!" Socks, my geriatric mutt... straight from the outback! So now her son has told all the neighborhood kids about the new Dingo down the street.

I also got to meet my other next door neighbor. I am going to endearingly refer to her as the crazy cat lady. She's not crazy... but she does live alone, she has a bunch of foster cats and bunnies, wears crocks, doesn't eat meat, drives a 1989 Honda with liberal bumper stickers all over it, is a self proclaimed pack-rat, and talks A LOT. I know her life story already. Her house is hardly visible from the street because of the overgrown shrubs and there's no clear path to her front door. But she likes animals and doesn't mind barking... which means she's the perfect neighbor.

Today's plan is to bike into town to Rite Aid to pick up Socks's pepcid and not get lost. I was also contemplating biking into campus to map out my classes... so that I look like I know what I'm doing on the first day of class.

I'd better make some rice before I go.

Awkward...

Do you ever say things that sound completely different than what you were going for? I do this from time to time... and I was just thinking about it. It tends to happen when I'm meeting new people, especially when it's 1 on 1. Last week, I was chatting with my neighbor in her living room and she was telling me about the great price she got on her new sofa. This thing was so plush and delicious looking -- I could just imagine the amazing naps to be had on that thing. So how did I compliment her sofa?
"It looks really nappy."
Uh, what?
You know! Nap-y. As in nap like. Not dreadlocks nappy. I managed to explain what I meant and things were fine, but it did produce the need to slap my forehead after I left.

I also remember telling someone that I am a pain in the ass sometimes. Realizing that I just somewhat insulted myself and that no one likes negative people, I corrected by saying, "Well I'm a good pain in that ass." WHAT? Now I sound like an anal fiend. If I were a guy, that would have been borderline creepy sounding.

I hope I'm not the only one.

Week one in Davis

Before I get into this week's misadventures, I'd like to make an important news announcement:
Mark got a job offer in Sacramento! A really good job offer. We're excited! And today, he finished school. So proud of my hunny with his sexy B.S. in Computer Science... woooooo!

So Monday (or was it Tuesday?) I had to pick up Socks's medication at the Rite Aid a few miles away. What a fantastic excuse to get out of the house and get more acquainted with my new town, right? I did my usual over-planning and google-mapped out my adventure route... and I soon found myself on a bus headed downtown. My student ID lets me ride the bus for free! But in normal Michelle fashion, I walked East instead of West after getting off the bus -- so Rite Aid was, of course, nowhere in sight. It wasn't until I hit the railroad tracks that I admitted that I was lost. After finally figuring out where I went wrong, I retraced my steps and headed back. It was nice to calmly stroll the streets of Davis and take in the nice non-desert qualities of this town. Cool breezes, tress, GREEN! It's delish.
After getting Socks's medication, I found the nearest bus stop and sat in the grass to get some rest. I shuffled through my purse to find my student ID and realized that I didn't have it anymore. I dropped it somewhere. ugh.
So now the bus is $1 instead of FREE. @#$@#$!
Angry and tired, I scratched an itch on my leg -- except I scratched off the scab from my stab wound. Now I'm bleeding profusely on the side of the road. My hands are dirty from my now necessary bus fare so I don't want to touch the wound... so I rummage through my purse to find some sort of dressing... A receipt! Good enough! The bleeding stops so I pull the receipt off... and the remaining scab sticks to it. FANTASTIC. Now I'm bleeding even more. I just crossed my legs and used my opposite leg to apply pressure to it. Now it hurts. Angry, tired, bleeding, in pain. This IS NOT how the day was supposed to go.

I got home and took my anti-depressants... ie. CHOCOLATE COVERED ANYTHING IN THE FRIDGE, which just happened to be bananas and strawberries. This was completely healthy because I used dark chocolate. And just to be ensure that this was a completely healthy, guilt free meal, I sprinkled flax seeds on it. Total health food.

Please ignore the phallic theme here -- what can I say? It's been weeks!

I didn't really do anything for the next few days. Small walks here and there with the pups, but no real adventures to report. Turns out there's a cute little park near my house. I walked through there one afternoon and saw the cutest thing: a little kid soccer practice. Little, like 5 year olds.


All the kids just stood there and yelled "I'm open! I'm open!" anytime someone else had the ball. It was way cute. Then I looked down, and saw this:

Ummm... utopia, anyone?

Today was a big day... I had real errands to run! I treated myself to lunch at Noodle City. For about 6 bucks they serve you a trough of soup and noodles. I was no match against the immense wonton noodle soup I ordered. mmmmm....


I picked up my bike from the bike shop as well, all tuned up and with new fenders! Gotta avoid that freshman stripe at all costs. I walked my bike out of the shop... and kept walking. I realized that I hadn't ridden a bike in 10 years... and I wasn't going to embark on my maiden voyage in the center of town. Cars. People. Michelle on her ass.... not going to happen here. My biggest fear in life is looking like I don't know what I'm doing. It's really silly, but I avoid it at all costs. So.. I walked that bike on the sidewalk with a confident look on my face ("oh yeah, I'm a cyclist who is just walking my bike to take in the sights... taking it easy...") for a good 6 or 7 blocks until I hit a great stretch of bike lanes near the campus.
I hopped on my bike and hey, it was like riding a bike. ::insert courtesy laugh:: Then I pedaled faster. I felt really cool! Like a cool kid... like look-at-me-I'm-a-student-on-a-bike-I-do-this-all-the-time! And then that cool feeling was replaced with tightening quadriceps and shortness of breath. Holy crap, I am out of shape. I huffed and puffed and made it home, victorious. I'm going to have to bike to the campus everyday until school starts in order to be somewhat prepared for my daily commute. Which reminds me: School starts Thursday! omgomg

After relaxing at home, I gathered up some dirty laundry and headed to the laundromat with Diego.

Diego disagreed.

I'm running out of food to eat so tomorrow I'll be headed back to the amazing farmer's market. Check out this great slide show about it: Full Belly and Full Basket

And that's it. :D

The Big Move

I'm not sure where to begin, because these past few days have been pretty crazy.
On Wednesday night, while were were on our dinner date, Renelle and I discussed the possibility of her coming with me for the move. My best buddy Robert had already committed to driving a rental car behind me, so I figured the extra set of hands and the company would be nice. In retrospect, it was definitely a great opportunity for her to see my new place and be part of the Michelle Relocation Experience. We pondered the different ways to go about this; Renelle's mother (remember, Renelle is my half sister) has been making a habit of leaving Renelle home alone for days at a time to visit some farm in Pennsylvania that's she's wasted invested her money on. These little trips have been more frequent ever since she's started sleeping with the younger, single dad down the street. She's on one of those rendezvous until the 17th of this month. Renelle wanted to just up and leave and not tell her, and we joked about how her mother would find out, file a missing person's report, only to have the cops ask her, "When did you last see your daughter?" and for her to reply, "Well... days ago when I left her alone to travel across the country." Ha.
Later that evening, I called her darling mother and told her asked her if Renelle could come. The answer was yes even before I called her... I just had to get it out of her. You know these types of people.
We didn't get out of the house on Thursday until about 4pm. The last minute packing turned into a huge event, and loading the last bit of the truck was surprisingly time consuming. Finally, we loaded up all the animals and headed out. Find Diego in each picture... haha.




Renelle was good company for the first 7 hours of the trip, then she fell asleep. One memorable conversation:

Renelle: Ughggghhhh!
Michelle: What's wrong?
Renelle: It burns!!
Michelle: what does??
Renelle: Liiiife!
Michelle: Uh... what? You're so weird.

I'm glad that we left so late. We didn't hit any traffic and we took our time with the idea that we'd stop somewhere and finish driving on Friday. However, Robert is just as stubborn as I am, so we drove the entire way that night. We made it to Davis on Monsters and coffee by about 2 am. We crashed at a Motel 6 and didn't wake up until 11:30am the next morning.



After cleaning up as best we could in the 30 minutes we had before checkout, we headed into Davis to pick up my keys. Of course, the office was closed for another hour for lunch. So we proceeded to the house just to get the moving truck parked in the driveway and take a little break. The back gate was open and the sliding door to the office was wide open. Hmmm... interesting. We opened the garage and started unloading. I went and got my keys and things were going as planned, until I realized that there was no washer or dryer. When we did the walk-through back in July, we were told the washer and dryer would stay. I purposely left mine at my house because of this. Mark called the management company about this as soon as I told him and their response was, "Well, in the ad, it doesn't mention a washer and dryer." Ugh. Robert said he'll bring them up with anything else that I may have forgetten once he saves up some money for another trip.
We managed to get the entire truck unloaded and ordered pizza for dinner. By 7pm we were tired, stinky but satisfied, and in need of a shower. Umm... there's no hot water. All the utilities are supposed to be on, and I'm sure they are.. I just think there's a problem with the hot water heater. My lovely and friendly neighbor offered to let us use her shower, but Renelle, the teenager, would rather brace the cold than go into someone else's house and shower. That lasted all of two minutes -- she emerged, half wet, with a "there's no way" look on her face. So we both headed next door, and I chatted with my neighbor while she showered.
Robert just elected the cold shower since he's bald and could get in and out in under 2 minutes.

Saturday: We turned in the moving truck in the morning. I turns out, I was 3 miles under the allowed mileage. Phew. We headed over to the Davis Farmer's Market and indulged in free samples of fruit and yummies for breakfast. Renelle bought a hot chocolate (made with Ghirardelli!) that she deemed the Best Hot Chocolate of her life. I bought the most amazing tortillas, then we ate some tamales, then I bought Renelle a Thai Iced Tea POPSICLE! Amazingness.
After another rest at home, we headed west to Vacaville in search of a WinCo foods. We stopped at a Jelly Belly store,

and this really neat, giant sized chess set.


Eventually we found the WinCo and I stocked up on the weird things that I like to eat, like FLAX SEEDS in BULK!!omgomgomg
After a quick dinner, Renelle and I went to the first UC Davis home football game. Robert stayed home with the dogs and rested. I bought Renelle a $5 Aggie Fanatic t-shirt and we both watched the game from the student section, which was incredibly loud and crazy and FUN!

She was a little apprehensive and self conscious at first, but by the second half she was yelling and cheering and having a good time. "Next time," she said, "we're painting our faces!" Once in a while, one of her friends would call her cell and she'd answer "I'M AT A FOOTBALL GAME AT UC DAVIS!" and you could tell she was really happy and proud to be there. It was cute.



She also kept saying, "I have to go to this school!" which was like music to my ears. This child needs to get out of the desert after high school.


We had some Ben and Jerry's after the game, and made our way home, exhausted.

Robert and Renelle left a few hours ago. I'm still really exhausted but I'm excited to start unpacking and decorating the house. My bike is getting tuned-up so I don't have any transportation until tomorrow, which forces me to stay home and get some work done. It's 80 degrees here, the doors and windows are all open, and my feet are cold.

I love it here already.

The Garage Door

So... a little bit of a lighter (well, sort of) post...

See that garage door from the last post? It's one of those old school wood on metal frame doors, making it really really heavy and awkward. When we replaced it with one of those modern aluminum paneled ones in 2000, Dad kept the old door and used it to partition the garage as to prevent dust from entering the house.
So of course, this was an obstacle in the garage cleaning process. What the hell do I do with this thing? Yesterday, my ex boyfriend from high school, Al, drove out to help with the garage. He's just that nice of a guy, and because he worked in there with my dad, he was familiar with what tools needed to be set aside for the move. And he's also more braun than brains, but I say that endearingly, especially since this happened:


We weren't sure how the garage door was fastened... was it nailed to the floor? We could only see one nail that was holding it to the back wall of the garage. Surely there was more reinforcement, right? I was in the kitchen when I heard, "OH SHIT!" ::GIANT CRASH::
Al had decided to take out what we later discovered was the ONLY nail holding this thing and gravity took over. It could have been disastrous, but instead it turned out to be something funny that my father would've appreciated.
We managed to drag this monstrosity out of the garage using very primitive means; small sections of metal pipe placed underneath in order to roll it out of there Egyptian style.


So on a late night whim, I put it on craigslist... and long story short, some nice lady arranged to pick it up. She was in her late 50's, and brought along 2 ornery old men, one of which made a great first impression by exclaiming: "This is the most worthless thing I've ever seen!" to which she enthusiastically would reply, "No it's great! It's a great garage door!" ...this went on for a good 20 minutes. They had shown up in a small truck, so I figured they were just going to look at it.
She finally got her way, and they decided to take it... on the truck they brought. I seriously thought they were kidding. So between all of us (and some amused neighbors) we put this giant door on top of the truck. Unbelievable. They were from Desert Hot Springs... anyone that knows this area can appreciate that added detail.



So that's the garage door story.

I've been pretty stressed out of my gourd today, but a lot was accomplished. I was driving to pick up the moving truck today while talking to Mark on the phone, when about halfway there he mentioned, "So.. who's taking you to pick up the truck?" to which I replied, "No one! I'm just going to go get it--- fuck." I pulled over, had a little hissy/stress fit, turned around, and found myself a ride. Who does that? Of course I need a ride to pick up another vehicle!

To give myself a break, I took Renelle to her favorite little Sushi place. We didn't really order any sushi -- she's a miso soup and cucumber salad addict, which is quite pleasant on my pocketbook. She was looking at her placemat with all the different types of sushi on it, and wondered out loud what the Salmon Roe was like. Big Mistake. I asked the waiter if he could bring her a little so she could try it. She thought it was awful. For once, I agreed with her on that one.




I'm still packing a few small things, but otherwise, the truck is loaded. I'm pretty sure saying goodbye to the house tomorrow will be easy if I get everything that I wanted to do done.
Back to work. :)

2 Days to go...

A great find from the garage:


I don't know what it is about this picture, but it makes me happy, angry, and really sad all at the same time.

I still don't understand how it went from that nice happy family, to

the widower and his daughter, to

just the daughter.

This version of the photo perfectly illustrates how I've been feeling for the past few months. You may look at me and see someone who's got it together... but this this what it's really like. It hits me hard to see the actual photo when I've been so used to the latter version.

I miss them. It's so unbearably painful today. I can feel my heart wringing out the tears like a common sponge, each twist accompanied by a pain whose depth is more than I can even fathom, much less describe. It's awful.

Perhaps tomorrow will be a better day.

This is the most difficult time of my life.

Gutting the Garage, Hour 7:
While negotiating a tight space, I backed into a knife. A KNIFE. Hello? Why is that poking straight out of a box like that? Puncture wound to the back of my calf. Intriguingly painful.

At least Diego will give me a hand paw...

I am so ready to get out of this desert. I don't know what it is about this area, but it is a weird vortex of fake people and self-servitude. Perhaps because we're so close to LA? Any transplant will tell you that this place is definitely different.
It's been almost fascinating to see how people are reacting to my leaving; there are those that ignore the effect that it's having on me and focus on how it is going to affect them; "You can't leave ME!" Then there's the I will never show any approval for what you do people; "Moving where? A new town where you won't know anyone and you'll have to start all over. Good luck..." I've quickly learned that "Let me know if you need anything!" quickly translates to "Let me know if you need anything so I can politely tell you that I'm too busy to help you."
Everyone that knows me knows when I'll be on my way -- and yet some of the people that I most expected to care have completely forgotten. Forgotten probably isn't the word... more like they are either too busy or it simply doesn't register on their radar of priorities, I guess. Fortunately, I've had a few surprises here and there, where an amazing phone call or visit completely makes up for it all.

I'm not thinking about it anymore. My next few days are completely dedicated finishing up with the packing, continuing the nightmare of the garage, and THEN getting the house up to Ready to Show to Potential Buyers condition. Today was spent trying to take care of the latter; I spent a lot of time painting what was supposed to be painted and scraping paint off of what wasn't supposed to be painted -- simply reinforcing my "if you want it done right, do it yourself" mantra.

So.. that's about it. I spent a great evening last night with the surrogate parents, and for the first time, I got really really excited about the future. It also made me completely terrified of not having my father around for all this. It was an interesting pang of fear which I've been quite successful at avoiding by simply not thinking about what is going on and what is yet to come. I keep telling people that I'll get excited once I get there, because frankly, I am far too overwhelmed with everything else to even crack a smile. Moving in itself is crazy and stressful -- and I have the joy of compounding it with the fact that i've never moved, this is my childhood home, I have to sort through my dead parents' belongings, i'm preparing this home to be on the market, and i'm alone in this insane endeavor. I'm by no means having a pity party... It's just somewhat humorous that there are so many factors that are making this ridiculously difficult. I'm getting pelted by lemons... and my lemonade pitcher is in storage! Ugh!

On a funny note, I took a break from scrubbing floors to train Diego to shake. My older dog, Socks, mastered this on her own. She is just one of those dogs that does it anyway so I took advantage of it. Diego? It took a little palatable encouragement. He managed to learn it in 20 minutes, which is impressive... but it needs some fine tuning.

I sit on the floor with treats when I work with him, and he never moves his gaze from them. I can't get him to look at me; he just starts throwing every trick he knows at me. I mean, I understand his logic -- these silly repetitious actions = food. So I tell him to sit and he starts snapping, barking, giving his paw, and when all else fails, he plays dead. Oh, and he wags his little tail while he plays dead. The big scary 80 pound doberman holding as still as possible and wiggling his little mechanical tail.
After this little bout of "Look what I can do!" I finally get him to sit patiently. Treat. Shake? Treat. Down? Treat. Okay, get back up, let's do this again. Sit? Treat.
I wait a second to make sure he's paying attention, then..
SMACK. Ouch! WTF? Paw to my face. Here it comes again. CHRIST! DIEGO STOP THAT!
He doesn't know any better... He outstretched that paw and went as high as he could with it. That's the most enthusiastic shake ever!

Treat.

I think i'll just stand when we work on his tricks from now on.

Total Holiday

The garage still isn't done, but there was definitely major progress made.
Mark drove 10 hours after school on Friday to be here and help me out, which quickly turned into me just standing in the middle of clutter making "keep it or toss it" decisions while he did all the heavy work. Not once did he complain. It was humid and gross and of course, really dusty, but we managed to get at least 70% done. He embarked on the 10 hour drive home yesterday morning, and about 30 minutes later, my dear friend Becky showed up. It's like a tag team of people making sure that I don't lose my mind. She was ready to roll up her sleeves and dig into the garage, but I was ready to just take a break from that. Our day consisted of a sushi brunch, a frozen yogurt date, shopping and troublemaking at Bed Bath and Beyond, Trader Joe's shenanigans, a nap, reheated stuffed crust pizza, eating mochi ice cream without utensils, and then a movie date. We hit a liquor store on the way to the movie and picked up a few cans of pre-mixed cocktails. I can't describe how satisfying it is to sit in an air conditioned movie theater on a hot day, sipping on a long island iced tea....
THE MOVIE WAS SIMPLY AMAZING.Go see it. Report back to me and tell me how much you loved it.

After the movie, we drove down to the new Agua Caliente hotel and visited my top secret favorite conversation spot. It's top secret but I'll tell you anyway, simply because it's nice. Top floor. That's it. There's a nice little sitting area, no one goes up there, and you get to see (occasionally) the types of people that get the expensive rooms at the top. Extra points if you're wearing a skirt and they wink at you.

That was about it; Becky drove back to Newport Beach and I soon fell asleep on my delicious new fitted sheet.

The end.

Today I have a billion things to do, but have put the off by sleeping in, eating breakfast very slowly, and typing this ALL IMPORTANT post. I am now going to take a 3 hour shower.

Then I'll think about what needs to be done today.

I can't wait until this weekend is over.

Less than two weeks until I move. I've reserved the moving truck and have only a few fixes on the house left to do. Tomorrow's adventure? The GARAGE.
When people hear this, they automatically assume that it's piled high with junk and forgotten belongings. This is only a half truth.

The garage was my father's domain. It was his workshop. He ran a business that supported us for so many years from that garage. If he wasn't in front of the TV with his giant bowl of popcorn, he was out there. Even when temperatures topped 110 in the middle of august, he was out there with some swamp cooler he had rigged up, or most recently, the air duct that he installed onto the main a/c unit that provided air conditioning directly on him.
That's where he reported to work everyday. He had the discipline that only a military man could have. Every tool was inventoried. He was amazingly organized. He could fix ANYTHING. (which is also why I never made it to the doctor's office for injuries.)

It's hard to explain the clinginess that we go through when people die. Yes, death is natural, blah blah blah... but it's so unnatural in a sense that one day they're here, the next day they aren't. I know that I immediately felt the need to cling to anything that reminded me of him. I'd stand in his closet and smell his clothes and cry. Does that make me weird? No. It's one of those things that people do that no one likes to talk about because it could potentially sound weird to non-mourners.
Those days are long gone now; I donated his clothes, his suits, his shoes... his bed is gone and so is all his bedroom furniture. I've saved the important things. I'm glad that I did that years ago, and I'm glad that I did it alone.

But that garage. There's a lot of baggage there. I am going to find all sorts of things that I don't need, but that may have value. Then what? Tools are great things to have, but I don't need ALL of them. But their replacement value is high. Is my father laughing at me for schlepping these things all the way to Davis? Or is he pissed that I just threw away some really awesome tool?
Or.. wait a minute, it doesn't matter either way because he is dead and if he really cared about his things he wouldn't have died. ::insert bratty face::

All joking aside, I have really put this task off as long as I possibly could. I'm looking forward to finding things that I haven't seen since my childhood, as well as being reminded of things that I've pushed out of my brain for so long. It's going to suck, it's going to be sad, it's going to be funny and it's going to be tough.

It's the last physical evidence that he was here.
... and I have to take it all apart.

EZ Lube Sucks

New carpet today! So exciting. The house is going to look more normal and I get to take a break from sweeping concrete on a daily basis. And better yet, the ferrets will get to play and explore around in my room... something I avoided letting them do because of abundance of dust on the cement floors.

The carpet padding is placed only after exceeding a high rating on the "Diego Comfort Scale".

So the EZ Lube drama continues. I am now taking them to small claims court since they have repeatedly ignored me. They really just don't care. Also, when figuring out who exactly I was suing, I found some inconsistencies with the name of the business and how they were listed on the Bureau of Automotive repairs and their business license. Just some shady stuff. My original court date was Sept 4th, however this needed to be changed because the parties have not been able to be served; so the summons now have to be mailed, which requires a month notice. So we're looking at anytime after the 14th of next month. Let's keep in mind that my Davis move-in date is Sept 10th. School starts the 25th. This is really a thorn in my side. The last thing I want to do (but will have to do, apparently) is move up there and fly back here for a stupid court date. This is all going to be very interesting.

So I was at my attorney's office and he mentioned that a friend of his had called -- the exact same thing happened to him! Same place, same song and dance -- EVERYTHING. Except he's a locksmith, and they ruined his van. When he mentioned his name, it sounded familiar. So I looked him up and called him. I introduced myself, then added, "I think you may have known my father..." and before I finished my sentence, he exclaimed, "You bet I DID! I watched you grow up and..." What a small world it can be sometimes. We're having dinner tonight to catch up and reminisce. My father was quite the character, the amount of people that knew him never fails to amaze me. Couple that with his love of talking about the daughter he ws raising on his own... there are a ton of people that have watched me grow up. It's a nice feeling.

So now that there's two of us, there's more proof that this isn't just some crazy random mistake. Who knows how many other people have had mechanical failures or had their cars downright ruined due to a simple, yet costly mistake.

Don't go to EZ-Lube.

More Sushi Feasting

There are so many things going on that it is just nicer to focus on one delicious highlight of my life:

Renelle loves sushi almost as much as I do. We had a roll competition tonight. It's pretty apparent that we both won.
What you see here are: 2 California rolls (Renelle made the one on the right, she got extra points for her snazzy presentation), a salmon avocado roll, and a Philadelphia roll. Yum! And of course, my salmon sashimi. Renelle isn't into salmon... so I had no choice but to eat all of it.
I think we're getting the hang of this. :)