Thursday Thirteen

I already received a call back from the animal hospital to start Monday... so along that theme, here are 13 pets that I've had:

1. Bonita the Cat - Technically, this was my mom's cat, but she's the first pet I remember having. She disappeared after my mother died. My grandmother (think old-school, die-hard, Mexican seventh day Adventist) always said that this cat cried real tears and meowed all night after my mother's death. This makes me laugh only because it is one of 1,000 things that my grandmother swears by, and I think are just a little exaggerated.

2. Daisy the Cat - This cat lasted until I was 6. She got stuck in the garage door a few times and managed to survive without a trip to the vet, and I was fed the explanation that cats have nine lives. She "ran away" and I regret never asking my father what really happened to that cat.

(I'm looking outside to the animal cemetery in the backyard to try and remember who's next)

3. Snow the Rat - This little white rat sat on my shoulder and in my pocket all the time. I took her to the street fair every weekend and we were great friends. I was 7 or so. And as a good pet owner, I even rented a male rat from the pet shop so that she could have a "honeymoon". The ensuing screaming and clawing coming from the cage made me never want to have a honeymoon. When she died (not from that! just old age) my father made her a Corian casket and I had a funeral for her and buried her in the backyard, to be exhumed a few months later. Doesn't every kid want to see what decomposition does??

4. A rabbit. I don't remember her name.
My neighbor has tons of rabbits in hutch in his backyard. Then he has a barbecue/pool party. Then the rabbits are gone, save a few. The day I put those events together was the day I ran over there and picked one out as a pet. She was pretty feral, but I was just happy to have saved her. She ended up being pregnant and had two tiny pink bunnies, one of which she squished. The surviving bunny was...

5. Honeybunny - The cutest bunny ever. Then again, HoneyBunny took snow's place as a fixture in my pocket at the street fair. I even had that little bunny leash trained. You have to picture me, in my tie die nightmare outfit, walking a tiny bunny on a leash in the middle of a street fair. Let me help you imagine this:

I soon became a bunny enthusiast and built my own rabbit hutch in the back yard. I dug trenches and put up chicken wire. I went next door and adopted a big black and white, virile male rabbit and put everyone together. A week later, they all died. I think he was sick. Or perhaps, a murder suicide.

6. Turtle the Turtle - I still have this guy. I bought him at an outdoor market in Guadalajara, sent him right through the x-rays at security, and hopped on a plane with him. He's quadrupled in size and I expect him to be around for quite a while. He's awesome.




7. Mrs. Socks the Dog- Right around my tenth birthday I got a puppy from some distant relative. I walked up to the litter and picked the cutest little tail-less puppy. I looked at her white little paws and deemed her Socks and we have been friends ever since. She's more human than dog and has a great sense of humor. You can usually find her napping on my living room table. I hope she can stick around for a few more good years.




8. Joe the Iguana - He was my 11th birthday present. I was way too young to have a reptile. I didn't know enough about reptile care so he died 3 years later from calcium deposits on his kidneys. The vet pointed this out to me by squeezing Joe's sides and causing him silently grimace in pain... like a silent scream. Then he put him to sleep. I'll never forget that Vet's insensitivity. It was after this that I became really obsessed with knowing the proper care for my pets in order to make sure they have the best life possible. There is far too high of a price to pay for not knowing.

9. Alamander the Salamander - I saw this adorable thing at WalMart in the fish department. I didn't know what it was but it was so cute. The inexperienced girl in that department explained, "Someone told me they grow legs or something." I dismissed that notion and brought my little creature home. Sure enough, his little antler things came off and he sprouted legs. I gave him some land in his tank and he was as happy as could be. Amazed with my little amphibian, I went out and purchased..

10. Becky the Salamander - My two salamanders lived for a good seven years. I want to have a few more at some point in the future. They're so darn cute! They're great observation kind of pets... not really fond of being held. You just feed them and keep their habitat nice and sometimes they'll flash you a little salamander smile.


11. Two Rats - They were left at my house by my little sister's mother (we share the same father, not the same mother) when they were installing tile in her home and then she "forgot" to pick them up. The reality was that my sister wasn't taking care of them (because by having animals, she was automatically supposed to be responsible instead of it being a learned trait) and so her mother was tired of the smell and having to feed them. So she half-assed pawned them over to me (way to go setting an example for your child! tired of animals? give your problems to someone else!) They lived for a good while until I noticed one lying motionless in the cage. Upon closer inspection, I noticed her head was missing. I quickly learned that rats are scavengers, and what was once a cage mate becomes food after they die. At first I was appalled... but then I realized that they are pretty damn efficient critters. The smell of death would probably attract predators, so eating fallen friends makes sense. Right? Anyway, Cannibalina out-lived her dinner pal by a few months.

12. The Ferrets - Over the course of one year, I accumulated 5 ferrets. First it was Charlotte and Mischief from a shelter in Phoenix. Then Buddy and Hazel from a lady in LA. Then Ricky from a shelter in Las Vegas. Buddy is now dearly departed, but I still have the other four to drive me crazy and hide all my things. Ricky is Deaf, and Charlotte is blind. So once in a while I hear terrified shrieks coming from their room... Ricky's trying to play with Charlotte, who can't see him and is trying to tell him she's in no mood to play - and he can't hear her.

13. Diego the Doberman - At around age 19 I put my maternal urges to rest by having a puppy. He's been my protector and best buddy ever since, and he keeps Mrs. Socks young. He makes late night runs to the ATM (or anywhere, really) really fun.

I think I might be an animal lover.